Today I am going to talk to you about the difference between “feeding” and “eating”. I feel like I can hear that inner voice. “We feed by eating each other…” hat’s exactly what I’m saying. Let’s see what is the difference between eating and eating in a relationship… That’s exactly what I’m saying. Let’s see what is the difference between feeding and eating in a relationship…
As you know, what we call feeding is the behavior of taking the nutrients needed by our body “completely and fully” into our body.
Physiological Needs are at the first level in Maslov’s famous pyramid. Eating, drinking, sheltering, sleeping and sex. These are our daily needs that we need to receive regularly and proportionally. When someone is spoiled or cannot be taken, or when the life cycle is established by feeding unilaterally (eating instead of talking and solving, resorting to alcohol or drugs, constantly falling asleep, constantly arguing and escaping from the environment, punishing the partner by refusing to have sex), it causes malnutrition and an unhealthy diet makes the relationship SICK.
Just as in physical nutrition, an aggressive hunger is experienced due to blood sugar in a short time when one-sided feeding is experienced, aggressive situations arise when we are fed one-sidedly in a relationship. At this point, feeding behavior is divided into two.
1. “Self-Eating – Self-Consumption”
2.“Feeding by eating your partner – consuming your partner”
| A Person Who Feeds By Eating Herself/Himself | A Person Who Feeds By Eating her/his Partner |
| · Consumes Herself/Himself
· Punishes Herself/Himself · Judges Herself/Himself · Criticizes herself/himself in a destructive, humiliating, demoralizing way · S/He cannot satisfy herself/himself, s/he is always hungry. S/He does not like herself/himself, she is not fulfilled . · Eats aggressively (usually) · Her/His self-confidence has been hurt. S/He says..”I have no self-confidence,” · S/he says herself/himself when talking to herself/himself: “I’m stupid, I’m retarded. I can’t do it. I can’t success. I can’t. I don’t deserve it…” · They are hungry due to feelings of deficiency and try to get full with food. It is the soul that is hungry. · S/he should get help from an expert on the subject. |
· Consumes Her/His Partner
· Punishes Her/His Partner · Judges Her/His Partner · Criticizes Her/His Partner in a destructive, humiliating, demoralizing way · S/He is never satisfied with her/his partner. Not fulfilled, disliked, dissatisfied. · Reject eating (usually) · S/he talks like s/he’s self-confident, but has an unnatural self-confidence. · S/he says her/his partner: “You are stupid, you retarded. You can’t do it. You can’t success. You can’t. You don’t deserve it…” · Their egos are hungry because of their feelings of deficiency. S/He tries to feel full and feel superior by eating and consuming her/his partner. · S/he should get help from an expert on the subject. |
When choosing a partner, we see it as perfect and try to change it when we cannot get enough nutrition. This time, the event looks like “Looking for broccoli in the butcher…!” S/He will give what is in herself/himself, as much as s/he wants to share. ”Stop looking for what s/he doesn’t have in her/him”. It’s time for you to question your choices and your self-delusions. Acceptance is good. Not from him, but to put your hand under the stone and feed from yourself. Feeding is not done by eating yourself, but by making yourself beautiful.
Like our body, our soul also needs feeding. There are some languages that are used for the woman to feed the man and the man to feed the woman..,
| For Women, Feeding Men Healthily | For Men, Feeding Women Healthily |
| · Feeling “Enough” is very important for men. Make your men feel enough for you. Appreciate their achievements.
· Praise your man’s performance and approve of him. · Make him feel that you need your man’s presence and what he’s doing. Men take pleasure in meeting needs. · Offer your man eroticism. · Show and tell him that your man makes you happy. · Always open the door to your man with a smile · Respect your man’s need to be alone · Respect your man’s existence · Respect your man’s family, stay away from arguments · Do not comment on your man’s job. You are not his colleague. · Don’t compare your man to other people. Do not criticize him destructively. . Stop complaining to third parties about issues related to your partner. Next to others, do not make comparisons. Respect your man, make him feel that you are his woman. Try to communicate correctly and constructively. If you are struggling in your relationship, you can get support from a specialist, but injuring your man will create more trauma for you. Avoid. |
· Touch your woman with LOVE
Listen and try to understand. You don’t have to approve, but listen… (Women speak so that they can be heard. They raise their voices to be heard and repeat their complaining speech.) If you listen to her with interest, if there is such a situation between you, it will end. · Pay attention to small changes in your woman, tell her you notice it. · Tell your woman “You are important, you are precious, you are valuable” both verbally and make her feel these things. Ask her how she understood your love by your actions. Some women describe love with gifts, while others when they are helped, some are embraced. Learn your partner’s love language. (I recommend reading 5 love language books) · Feed your woman with romance. · Desire your woman with LOVE in your bed. Keep the word need out of bed.. · Your woman should know that she is safe with you and should not create a question mark in her mind about the stability and continuity of the relationship. · Always be KIND to your woman.. · Do not compare or criticize your woman. Tell him how you would feel better. · Insulting your woman will never make you happy. Strive to communicate truthfully and constructively. If you have difficulty in doing this, you should seek help from an expert on the subject. |
The question to be answered in relationships is: “Do we feed each other? Or are we eating each other?” If you’re eating each other, it’s time to hit a “stop” button.
Now it’s your turn to take steps to regulate your feeding style and quality of your life.
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